Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Day 59

So I spent much of yesterday crawling around the floor looking for a microscopic rock. I even said a prayer to Saint Anthony, turned around a few times and danced a jig. Come on Tony! Where is my diamond? Haven’t I been good? The law of attraction suggests that “what goes around comes around”, and I’ve been doing my civic duties by donating to charity, doing volunteer work, putting the needs of others before my own, being the best wife and mother ever. Why are you stealing my diamond?! By the “what goes around comes around” philosophy losing ones engagement diamond should probably only happen to philanderers and tramps, not those who are true to their vows and faithful to the Nth degree! Come on!! Be kind. Yeah, well, so I sometimes crush on celebrities but they are out of reach so it doesn’t count. And yes, it’s true, I can get a crush on someone who reminds me of a celeb, but I don’t act upon it. It’s just silly fantasy. It’s not worth stealing a diamond for. Maybe I am being punished for something that hasn’t happened yet?! Maybe it’s not me at all. Maybe the engagement diamond has gone because of something Derek has done!!! Right, well … we need to get to the bottom of this … the bastard!! How dare he. HOW DARE HE!!

Or maybe I quite simply didn’t look after my ring and I just lost the bloody thing. But that is too simple. There has to be a greater universal explanation …

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