Saturday, March 20, 2010

Day 167

Is there ever a point where the piddling ends? At what point as a woman do you finally find a period in your life when you are no longer cleaning up wee. There’s the kids, and the pets, and yourself (depending on your sneeze/pelvic floor compatibility) and then your parents, and their pets, and the grandkids and their pets ….

For me right now it is the Little White Fluffy. Millie has taken to pee’ing inside! You may recall that a few months back I went to a business function one evening to come home to no dinner (thanks guys) and a wee on the carpet. Nice. Glad you saved it for me. More recently I came home from boot camp to find my family sitting around in their PJs and a piddle on the shagpile (not really shagpile, it just sounded nice) and this morning I woke up to not one, but two pees in separate areas of the family room rug. I have got out that special spray thingimo from the vet which is specifically formulated for dog and puppy urine and apparently “breaks down uric acid salt crystals”. This supposedly stops marking of territory. It says it is veterinarian strength. I’ll keep that in mind next time my friendly neighbourhood vet urinates in my living room. I don’t think Millie is marking her territory but rather hasn’t done the pelvic floor exercises she should have done as she neared deep fried fruit age. I guess they don’t have “fanny physios” in the dog world that teach you about gyno yoga. Anyway, the bottom line is when she needs to go, she needs to go, so we may have to start shovelling her outside again to sleep in the wild with suburban possums, gnats and our friendly compost mouse.

I can’t keep spaying the stuff and watching the stain dry (minute by excruciating minute) and respraying and watching and respraying and watching until it sets into an obvious shadow. Yep, I can still see it. So I respray and watch and respray and watch.

I’m sorry single white fluffy female, but you can’t room with us if you are going to disgrace yourself this way. You just can’t! We’re seriously going to have to renegotiate your lease.
At least she isn’t pooing I suppose. Pooing would be very bad …

I'm off to hire a carpet shampoo'er ...

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