Saturday, July 10, 2010

Day 278

OMG!! Hair. HAIR!!!

I am transfixed with the whole lioness debacle. I can't stop picking at my chin. Tahlia said to me recently as we were waiting at a set of traffic lights "Mum, stop stroking your beard". Shit.

I hate this age onset female chin hair thing. I absolutely despise it! I am trying to find ways to embrace it, be grateful for it, even see the funny side, but right now I refuse to see the positives. It is what it is. I have a beard. A deep fried beard.

As I pluck and examine and pick, it is becoming obvious that it's not just Caramello Koalas and kids multiplying in my life (see here and here), but I also have thick black keratinized proteins doing their times tables at an alarming rate. Chin hair. CHIN HAIR!!! Now that's enough to give Deep Fried Fruit the fuckity fuckits.

Last night I took to the bathroom after a particularly long chin fiddle. It's one thing to tweezer the suckers from the chin, but quite another to uproot the demons from the upper neck/under chin area (that's where it becomes less beard and more mane). I was not born with a flip top head. Putting the head back for enough plucking light meant no eye to mane contact. Bugger. It was time to get a torch. What a HUGE mistake! It was bad enough thinking I had a bit of a crop, but actually seeing an entire forest!!!! I hate this Deep Fried Fruit. What's worse than a few black chin hairs? A forest! What's worse than a forest of black chin hairs? When some of them are GREY!!!

LASER!!!!!!!!!!! Laaaaaaaaassssssssseeeeeeer.

And that's all I've got to say about that.

5 comments :

  1. But if I used Nair will it be just like shaving and grow back even thicker and bushier? Have you used Nair on your face? I would love it to work! Please say it works. If it works Lucy I am there!!!! I am just scared I'll wake up looking like a werewolf ...

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  2. If either of you gets the answer to this, pleeeezzz let me know! I also have the same werewolf fear about Nair, etc. I'm going to check out the RX cream, "Vaniqa," next time at the doctor's. In the meantime, keep that Tweezerman sharpened!!!

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  3. Ladies, ladies, ladies...you're so funny, but relax. Shaving, waxing, Nairing or Nadsing doesn't actually make hair grow back thicker or bushier per se, it's a myth. It can appear to because of the way the hair is cut - by shaving in particular, but if this was true people with thin hair would pluck it out to make it grow back thicker! Think it was a popular women's magazine where I read this, so maybe a bit of info might be on the net to confirm or deny. I think they said to just use whatever hair removal method was most comfortable, affordable & accessible to you.

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  4. *nods*

    I was going to say that too, boomerang jane... If you shave hair it looks like it's more thick as you shave at an angle....

    Also grows back faster as opposed to plucking or cream removal which pulls the little bugger and its roots out at the same time so it takes longer to grow back

    Some manufacturers make wax strips for facial hair but OMG you have to have nerves of steel to pull it off surely.... or a sadistic friend would help I guess lol

    *hugs*

    xxxx

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