I am not a naturally positive person. I'm one of those people who thinks too much about all the possibilities. All the scenarios. All the endings. Whether they be good or bad. Then I have to encourage myself to believe in the good and that everything will be OK.
From the outside people think I'm an optimist. I guess I am ... but there's a whole lot of a stuff going on inside my brain before optimism pokes its head out.
I put a lot of work into my positivity. Into my optimism. Into my "anything is possible" mindset.
I put a lot of effort into thinking myself happy.
Right now our family is back in crisis mode. Our eldest daughter is back to fighting the big fight.
We are thinking of every possibility. The good, the bad and the ugly.
The thinking is wearing
Sometimes the best thing to do is not think at all. Just breathe and have faith that everything will turn out OK.
So today I will not think.
Today I will simply breathe.
Given the news we have just received this post seems a little "lacking" and I know my writing is cryptic. But this new challenge, this new diagnosis, is not my story to tell. So I can't go into detail.
That doesn't mean it doesn't affect us deeply. My blog is about aging positively and is largely full of sunshine, blue skies and unicorns. But behind the scenes there are often grey clouds, thunder and monsters. We will not let this monster win.