Day 345

Do you ever wonder if, when you dream about someone, they've had the same dream?

I had a dream last night about a guy I used to be really good friends with at uni. It was never romantic, although there were hints it could have been, but the timing was never right. Besides, you could "hint" with anyone of the opposite sex at uni (if the truth be known) connection or not! And we made really good friends. Anything else would spoil it. So we did nothing about it and continued to be mates. Anyway it's clear to say we had a bit of a connection. Anyway, as time went on this guy friend and I drifted apart because there was no room in my life for a guy friend with my new boyfriend. Many years later after I'd broken up with the live-in BoyF and had just started dating Derek I came across my guy friend in a shop, he was with a girl, and we looked at each other and then looked away. We've been doing that ever since ... Isn't that sad!!! So anyway, I dreamed about him last night. It was very vivid. We were on a bus trip together that was taking us to some uni reunion. None of my friends were there, only the odd acquaintance, and us. We sat next to each other and held hands and basically just talked and talked and talked. It was comforting and weird.

The other night I had a similar dream about another guy friend. This guy friend is someone I vaguely worked with. It was not an every day working relationship. We'd see each other only a few times a year. But when we did we had stuff to talk about. We were friends. When I left the Department we continued to email each other 2-3 times a year to catch up. I got to hear all about the perils of internet dating sites, and he got to hear about life as a SAHM who has so many projects she never actually stays at home. Another nice friendship. Anyway, I dreamed that I left Derek for him!!! (Don't worry, I've told Derek about the dream ... I'm not dream cheating on him or anything.) But the funny part of the dream was that when I went to spend Christmas with my new beau (in my dream) he came out of his bedroom in a frilly ladies dressing gown, a shower cap and acrylic nails. He was a cross dresser! In my dream I was all "oh my God what have I done!" and when I woke up I was relieved to still be with my hubby.

But all this dreaming raises some interesting issues about cross gender mateship. I don't have any firm views one way or the other about whether it is doable or dangerous, but my subconscious is obviously working on it. Having all these male friends wandering into my bedroom at night is starting to feel a bit strange. And having to admit my dream affairs to hubby is getting a bit draining.

Is it possible that there is like an alternative universe out there and our dreams are a window to what is actually going on in a parallel world? Could it be that these guys are having similar dreams and we are connecting in fantasy land (or could it be hallucination-ville)? Is this yet another sign of Deep Fried Fruitnom and some sort of need to sew wild dream oats at middle age? Or is it just something I ate and I'd be better off cutting out spicy food before bedtime? Hmmmm .....