Thursday, September 8, 2011

Day 702

I do lots of stuff.  I help out wherever I can.  I wear many many hats and usually I love every minute of it.

But occasionally you can be asked for one more favour, or one more volunteer request and the entire carefully stacked pyramid of projects, time management and output can come crashing down around your ears.

It happens to me sometimes.  Simply because I don't seem to have  "NO" switch inside me.  Oh sure, I'm full of advice for other people in this situation, but don't take any of it myself.  I don't think I'm a martyr (am I?) I just kinda think that if you are physically capable of contributing then perhaps you should. Perhaps ...

Yesterday, for example, I was asked to do one more thing.  Could I please coordinate the calisthenics concert (like I did last year).

Now I do lots of things but I don't play an active role in calisthenics.  Other than the occasional sequining and little jobs on comp days, I basically drop Tahlia off and run. So I know I've gotta do my bit. And if the truth be known, I had been waiting for the request, so I wasn't surprised.  The role shouldn't be that strenuous given I put a system in place last year and could use much of the paperwork and signage etc this year.

But the the thing is, it's another "something" I am responsible for.  Another project to add to my pile. Something else cluttering my brain. It's another event that I have to pull off over the next two months.

When I was asked I initially blanched a little.  I gave all the reasons why this would be so difficult for me right now. Over the next six weeks I have the following:

  • five different work projects that I am leading and which require output for the survival of my business
  • A book that is about to be released any day
  • ACT State Cheer comp to get through and Australian Cheer Nationals routines to choreograph
  • My step-daughters wedding
  • 2 x 40th birthdays to attend (both out of town) and a 50th
  • two calo comps to support
  •  a three day conference to attend in Sydney 
  • my daughter's birthday party
And then when that is all done I am coordinating the year 6 party and I am coaching and attending the Cheer Nationals.  All of this with a family to look after, work to do, books to write, children to cuddle, parents to see, and a Husband to love.  Oh, and did I mention that there is a major wedding in there?!

Excuses, excuses, excuses.  As I was saying it all I knew that it wasn't helping get the calisthenics concert off the ground.  But what shit me about it was that there are people within the club who do nothing.  NOTHING.  There are people within the club who do heaps, and then there are people within the club who actually have the luxury of time (don't work, don't have any responsibilities other than themselves and their child) and they don't contribute.  That shits me.  

But then while I was having a poo bomb explode in my head with associated steam coming out my ears I realised that they may never feel as complete as I do. They may never truly be able to own the feeling of "contribution".  Sure I may die from exhaustion and a caved in head in the process, but at least I know that my contribution quadrant of life is full and that I am being a positive role model to my kids by giving back to the people in society who give so much of their time and energy to me and my family.  I think contributing is all part of gratitude.

So with that, I can't sit here talking to you anymore.  I need to clear the poo stinky from my brain and dig out that paper work from last year's concert and start putting this event together.   And if the truth be known, part of me is looking forward to it ...


Where the hell is that "NO" button?!??

What about you?

Do you find it hard to say no?

Where do you sit on this whole "contribution" debate?


  1. See my latest FB update, should say it all, lol.

  2. I say NO to everything at the moment. Mostly because I'm unwell, but also because I did so much back in the day - I ran two Playgroups, canteened, covered books, volunteered at the Salvos, ran a Compassionate Friends group -- I'm basically all niced out.
    Now I huddle at home being entirely selfish.
    And I LIKE it :)

  3. Holy Shit Toni! You deserve to say "no". That's a nice contribution haul you've got there ...

  4. My, you have got a lot on your plate. But as that saying goes, if you want something done - ask a busy person! You are a champion at getting things done & making it look easy in the process.

    Like Toni, I have had many years of saying yes and doing for others, and in the past few years - this one in particular - I've chosen to step back a bit and try to limit the giving to myself and my family for a while. I guess we don't truly know what others are dealing with at home, or what they've done or plan to do. I think it's nice to live by the ethos of those that can will - and those that can't right now might later.

  5. That's nice Boomerang Jane. That makes me feel less cranky. Yep - those that can't right now might later. I'll take that ...


I love hearing your thoughts! Keep them rolling in :)

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